Musings Of A Mom Who's Been There

I was disturbed today to read the following article - an article that has gone viral on the internet.  I really don't have to post the link because you can find it anywhere, but here it is just in case you've been out of touch today.
Tooele-teen-gets-national-attention-over-dress-code-drama.html



My initial reaction was possibly like yours, "well, she really isn't dressed that immodestly,especially considering what I've seen girls wearing to school  Why are they picking on her?"  But I've had school dress code issues before, only mine were with our school being TOO lenient with a dress code, so that initial reaction left pretty quickly and I was left with the following thoughts.

First of all, they admit in the article that her dress was 1/2 inch shorter than the dress code allows.  BUT there were students who were dressed far worse than she was, why weren't they singling THEM out?  And leaving her alone?  And letting her wear her 1/2 too short dress?   Because, as she admits, "This was really embarrassing."  But, if her dress really was, or even if it wasn't, a half inch too short, then wouldn't it be a great teaching moment to say to school officials, "Thank you for having a dress code.  We will be more careful to make sure our daughter's clothing fits the dress code you have set because we appreciate high standards."  Nope, this dad compares his daughter's being held in the office for a dress code violation while he, the father, brought her more appropriate clothing, as the beginning of her life of crime.  Over reacting?  Just a little bit, I believe. 

Second, they state that this is the only type of dress available for purchase in today's stores.  And I am left wondering about the implication here.  Should we base our personal standards of dress on what the fashion world is selling us?  Because that is a scary thought!   No, in every age there have been standards issues with the clothing industry and girls have overcome those issues over and over again and lived to tell about it.  This young lady can, too, and she may even be better off in the end.       

And third, they are hoping by making this an issue "this will help it get corrected a little bit."  After all, this is 2012, not 1912.  So, in 2012 how short is too short?  Is three inches above the knee a safe limit to set?  Or is that too 1912?  Should they set it at four, or five?  Who decides?  Because we can't leave that decision to school personnel, they are probably the ones who set this inappropriate dress limit that is apparently much too strict.  The only option left is to have no dress code at all.  And that just depresses me all to pieces.      

Lastly, I am so saddened that this girl is receiving all of this attention for standing down instead of up.  Let's take a stand for lower standards, not higher.  This girl and her family are hoping by making a big deal out of this that the school will lower their standards.  What a sad thing to stand for, lower standards.  As I read this I was reminded of many times I stood with my children on many difficult school issues, but this one in particular seemed to fit the bill for this example.  My son had an English teacher that he and all of his friends thought was much too hard a teacher for eighth grade students.  After all, one of his friends had a Dad who was in a college English class and HIS class wasn't as hard as their eighth grade English class.  I remember talking to him about it, and then saying, "I just can't go in to a teacher and say 'I think you expect too much'.  I can never fault a teacher for having high expectations for his students.  You're just going to have to work harder."  And he did.  And that teacher is still teaching.  And, ironically, he no longer is the hardest English teacher in the school district.  He has been replaced by a teacher with even higher expectations.  per aspera ad astra  ("through hardship to the stars")

In the last General Conference a talk by Quinton L. Cook called "In Tune With the Music of Faith"  states, "We also recognize that many individuals are not in tune with sacred things. Chief Rabbi Lord Sacks of England, speaking to Roman Catholic leaders last December at the Pontifical Gregorian University, noted how secular some parts of the world have become. He stated that one culprit is “an aggressive scientific atheism tone deaf to the music of faith.”  That secularism is only going to get worse and at a more accelerated pace.  At some point people of faith are going to have to take a stand.  My hope for myself, as well as for my friends and family is that they stand up - not down.

Just Flippin' Through Pictures . . .

We had a great Stake Conference today.  Which made me think of my kiddos and all the things I should have done better when they were little and utterly under my control.  Our Stake Conference got out early!  But that meant the really good roast I was cooking for dinner wasn't finished cooking yet, so I started flipping through pictures on my hard drive and they brought back so many happy memory's - which is why I take pictures - for the memory's.  So here are a few I found . . ..

This picture always makes me laugh.  Aiden is in his "king of the world" stance, that I taught him, incidentally, and Porter is trying to push Bridger off the chair!  Bridger is the only little guy cooperating, and he's the baby of the group.  "And a little child shall lead them."

Ha Ha!!  I forgot about this picture in the quest to get good family pictures for Jill and Kenny's adoption profile.  Jill, look at this picture whenever Kenny needs to be taken down a notch, as all men do occasionally, and know you are queen of the snowballs :)

You had to be there for this one - it was October and the water was so cold, but we were taking Landen's senior pictures and we made her get out in the middle of the creek and sit on a rock and Kimbrey got into the water to get the best angle for taking her pictures.  And they were SO cute!!  Totally worth freezing Kimbrey's feet for :)

These two are a series of shots that prove boys will always be boys.  See Chase watching intently as those two boys pick  up the biggest rock they can find so their splash will be epic?  And see the total glee on Brennan's face when he realizes he and Daniel did, indeed, make an epic splash?  Yup, boys.

And this one makes me giggle.  All throughout our France trip Brennan kept referring to the "touchdown statue", so when we finally saw the touchdown statue, I made them go stand by her and raise their hands in the touchdown signal themselves.  They did it, but you can tell they didn't want to, and they have classic, "I feel so stupid" stances.  But I didn't care.  I have a picture of two of my boys making a touchdown signal with the "touchdown statue".  That's all that matters.

We were in France.  IN FRANCE!  And this is what Dave wanted to see. . .

The best picture we took of ME in France.  Brennan is on his way in  . . .or out . . .and I'm . . . not sure.  Licking my lips maybe?  Attractive!

And Aiden, trying to get rid of hiccups.  Note the crossed legs, drinking water with one finger in his ear.  And it worked!!

Totally random pictures, but they made me smile.  Ah, the memory's . . .
 

YIKES!! My Baby Is Getting Married.

 Let me introduce Drew and Kara.  They are ENGAGED!  Holy cow!  Drew has tried to prepare me for months, but I've been in denial, because . . .well, he's the baby, and babies just shouldn't get married!





This weekend we met Kara's family.  Kara and her five siblings live here in Moab.  She is the oldest girl, she has an older brother, a sister just graduating from high school, and three younger brothers.  They live together and take care of each other without help from their parents.  The way they deal with the situation that has been dealt them is admirable.  Especially the way they all take care of their youngest brother who is autistic. 

 Kara is soft spoken and quiet like Drew.  They probably would never have met but Kara accidentally texted Drew one day.  The rest is history. 

 They are a cute family.  They have a lot of fun together and enjoy each other.  And Drew fits right in :)  Kara makes him happy, and that's uber important to a Mom, that her children are happy.  And they look pretty happy, don't you think? 

We Pause For This Commercial Break

 Because the day was so nice, because we had too many things we were "supposed" to do, and because Brennan had spent every waking moment of the last week sitting at a desk studying, we chose to be irresponsible on Saturday.  So, we rented a Razor for me, loaded up the bikes for Dave and Brennan, and went playing in the dirt.

 

These guys like to ride fast, and I like to stay out of their dirt.  So they spent a lot of time coming back to look for me.  I'm flattered :)

 We called this place "The Craters of the Moon".  We tried to take a group picture, but I had my long telephoto lens on.  So I had to set the camera quite far from our posing  spot, push the button and run.  This time, I didn't make it. 

 So Brennan took over.  Apparently he can run faster than me.  Go figure.

 Here they come, the Cozzens men on their motorcycles

 A photographic moment.  I was trying to pan as Brennan and Dave rode past me.  This was the best of the panning bunch.

 Here is some of the pretty scenery we got to see.  It was so quiet and nice and beautiful.  A fun day for me :)

 More scenery - I thought this was interesting.  This is some kind of pump . . or something . . . that keeps this water tank full of water . . . or something.

My favorite picture of the day.  I came around a corner and found Brennan hanging out on his bike waiting for me to show up.  Just melted my little heart.  And now, the day is over and we're back to our regular over scheduled lives. But we have the memories. 

A Little Behind, A Little In The Way

 

Some days you can just be standing there minding your own business, offering support to the man and two little boys running the track hoe and all of the sudden . . . 

 You are not my mother, you are a SNORT.  PUT ME DOWN SNORT!  PUT. ME. DOWN!!!

 And the Snort DID put the scared Grandma down.  But the boys in the Snort thought the whole thing was pretty funny : )

Good thing they're sweet boys.  Who will pose with me on the bridge while Drew tries to get his composition photography assignment done.  This one was supposed to show lines leading your eye towards something . . .or something like that.  Whatever it was, I'm not in a track hoe bucket, and I AM posing with a cute Porter face :)

Keeping Busy Part 2

 This week it was my turn to teach Young Women's.  The lesson was on Finding Joy Now, so I made these little Almond Joy handouts that say Happiness does not depend on what happens outside of you, but what happens inside of you.  That was a quote by Harold B. Lee.  They were fun and easy to make, just paper and glue, but the girls thought I was MAGIC!  I love it when they think I'm amazing :)

 I also made these cute little "Spiritual Bucket List" journals.  Because my lesson on Fast Sunday is also supposed to help them work on a Personal Progress goal, I chose Individual Worth #4 - in which they are supposed to make a list of their hopes and dreams and then map out a plan for them to accomplish those things.  So I had them list one hope or dream or goal at the top of each page of these little memo books and then use the rest of the page to map out a plan of how they were going to accomplish that thing.  I gave them ten minutes to write in them and they were quiet and frantically writing the whole time.  A miracle!!

 

I also spent some of my day yesterday making these.  This is a "mini" or  "pocket sized" Book of Mormon and the cute little cover is all iron on.  No sewing involved at all!  We are going to make these for the girls for their birthdays - plan B after the UNO cards wouldn't fit in the cans we were going to put them in.  So cute!  In fact, I think I'm going to make one for me to throw in my purse. 

Dave is still drywalling.  Funny how I can spread drywall mud and the mud stays on the wall, but Dave gets it everywhere!!  But I couldn't drywall yesterday.  I had cute little Young Women's projects to make :)

Insuring That We're Busy

One of the purposes of trying to blog every day - I know, I haven't blogged EVERY day, but much more frequently than in the past, you have to admit - is to insure that I DO something worthwhile every day.  The danger of being "empty nesters" and not having anyone depending on you even getting up in the morning, especially if you aren't very self motivated, is that you may spend your days watching 39 episodes of "How I Met Your Mother" instead of accomplishing something of worth.  So, inspired by pintrest, and much to Dave's chagrin, I have made some assignments.  This is Daves:

This has been a closet without a cause and we have tried to figure out how to put doors on it or something to in some way make it fit in the nice, fairly new family room.  Then along came this idea on pintrest.  PERFECT!

So some day soon we hope Dave's project above will look something like this.  We shall see : )

My project is the stairs.  They have never been finished and I have so many unfinished areas of my house that I just didn't care until now.  Today I have been drywalling and sanding with the intent that some day soon, my stairs will look like this.

  Without the wall board, with the stair rail on the other side and all that.  But similar.  These are long term projects, I understand that, even though I'm not patient with it : )  But just so my soul is able to survive the slowness that we are, I did do a project today that I could finish. 

Ruby slippers for our New Beginnings that will have a Wizard of Oz theme.  The Ruby Slippers are going to have a cellophane bag with Hershey kisses inside the shoe, because the idea is that Dorthy was given everything she needed to succeed in her quest to get to Oz - Ruby Slippers and a kiss.  And Young Women are given everything they need to succeed at Personal Progress - a Personal Progress book, leaders and parents.  Now, I just have to make another 25 or so.  Thank goodness for projects.  Projects will save the world - if just from bad T.V.